I CHRONICLE THIS EVENT

A Christian Blog on Loss and Grieving
Her Precious Gift, Week 3 of 8
emily ulman/7July25

An eight-week blog on Loss and Grieving, this is Week 3, Her Precious Gift:

Enroute to the holiday service at church, it’s 5:15 p.m. and dark outside on this Christmas Eve as we, my husband, grown daughter, and I, stop in to see Mom. We find her in the home’s common area, asleep in her wheelchair. Her head slumped forward, her aromatic plate of homecooked dinner sits in front of her, barely touched. The reduced holiday staff tends to those around us as we try to wake her, asking if she’s hungry. Mom opens her eyes long enough to register our presence and responds with a slight change to her facial expression, the tiniest smile of awareness, before her heavy eyes close again.

Turning my attention to the festive gift bag I’m holding, I pull out her Christmas gift, a calendar filled with family photos and reminders of special dates. Again, I call to her. Mom opens her eyes and tries hard to focus on the cover photo capturing all her daughters and sons-in-law together recently at a restaurant. Jokingly, I ask if she recognizes any of these people. Slowly, she smiles and teases her response, “Well, no….” Trying to keep her attention, I ask if she likes her gift. Still smiling she gets out a gradual “Yes….” before her heavy eyes again fall shut. Thinking of distracting myself by taking the calendar to her room, I attempt to pick it up out of her hand, but she grasps it tight. Realizing there will be no more response from her this Christmas Eve night, and having nowhere to retreat to, my suppressed emotions well.

I pull a folding chair close and sit on its cold metal. Laying my head on her shoulder, quietly I embrace my sleeping mother and soak in her warmth. At this, Mom slightly adjusts her own head, now resting on mine. A tender act of motherly affection, her precious gift to me on this Christmas Eve night. And my welled tears flow.

Loss and grieving begin even while loved ones remain with us.

In Matthew 7, Jesus tells of two men, one wise one foolish. Powerful rains and vehement winds come against the homes each built. Of the foolish man’s house, “great was its fall”, for he’d chosen for its foundation an untrustworthy source. The wise man’s house, however, withstood “for it had been founded upon the rock”, solid and reliable (see verses 24-27).

In this life, vehemently difficult circumstances abound, pushing us to our limits, risking our ability to withstand. We do, however, get to choose the foundation upon which we build our lives. This decision is to be carefully and wisely selected, for our lives and those within our lives, are gravely affected by our choice. Available for our choosing is the “everlasting Rock”, trustworthy and unwavering, Christ the Lord. “For my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I shall not be shaken” (Psalm 62:5b-6 NASB).

The Solid Rock

(a Gospel Hymn by E Mote, 1834)

My hope is built on nothing less

Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness

I dare not trust the sweetest frame

But wholly lean on Jesus’ name

On Christ the Solid Rock I stand

All other ground is sinking sand

All other ground is sinking sand

…

When He shall come with trumpet sound

O may I then in Him be found….

***